Fragile: This Side Up

I wonder if you’ll still be around when I’m six feet underground. Back at 1715, I’ve been through just about everything an ordinary human as humanly possible, transformations and transfigurations. Evolution of minds, and evolution of souls, Beliefs became unbelievable, and the unbelievable became the past, remains present, and awaits in the future. Now I’m packing into boxes, meaningless belongings, kited by rancid memories and dreams came true. Everything will turn to a nostalgic sepia as hopes of vibrance lay on the road ahead.

I’ve bathed in the wild and reckless pools of youth, and can successfully say I still walk among them. Earning the childhood I never had in late cherry blossums, I cannot bring it with me. I seek to sort the uncertainties of society to ultimately become mundane. Despite it’s sounding nature of banishment, it’s actually what we all look for, admittedly or not. We live by the night and the speeds of the far left lane in order to find the one person we can take a quiet walk with during the day. That by definition is mundane, yet holds more value than dancing with the devil. I’ve danced, I’ve sung, and I’ve avoided sleep, but now I want to be still, silent, and smiling.

With the new dwelling close at hand, I know I will not receive what I want, Sometimes, even what I want is questionable. I can either repeat what I’ve done or evolve into skipping all the unsanitary formalities.

I have no expectations for any of my peers to share the same mentality, and I have little faith in their attempts to understand. I’d always been alone, and have survived thus far. Even with parents, brothers, sisters less than 10 feet away, my castle walls were fortified to defend. Sleep with locked bedroom doors, and window blinds shut, not even the sun had my permission to shine on me. But one has to realize, you’re also shutting out truth in happiness, shutting out the connections necessary for self preservation, validation. Shutting out the vibrance of life. It is through this, one realizes they have to jump across the moat to the other side.

Trusting your entire existence to someone, and praying they will not put it in a cupboard or lock it away. I’m all out of chips but the risk, determines how big your wins are.

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