a strong drive and urge to motivate myself into accomplishing something hazardous to all. intricately detailing the explosive device i cherish with exhausting pieces of my soul to discourage anyone with an intent to defuse. something unstoppable, until it explodes. my conscience is slowly waking to the blinking lights on the device to see the soul hard at work, investing wobbly days and sleepless nights into this project in which neither had a proper democratic vote for. the device simply showed up, and curiosity led to the exploration of this enticing anomaly. the persistence of that pretentiously frail soul cracked a tiny opening in that reluctantly and stationary mystery exposing a nauseating, yet incredibly enticing, though brief, tightening of the air around the room. the confused operator, became instantly addicted to the alien feeling it had never felt before. it was nothing like he’d ever felt, a haunting pain that rushed andrenalin to parts of his being he never donated a thought to. he felt lighter, he felt stronger, he felt younger… he simply felt.
his curiosity piqued towards the tiny little wonder, wondering if he could get inside to discover the secrets tucked away, perhaps secrets to the world, universe, existence, purpose… life? the device had no intention of resisting, and the student had never failed any assignment that was laid in his tracks. he cautiously inched towards it until a mutual understanding was grasped. and with that, our curious surgeon cancelled all his appointments. he wanted no distractions that would potentially disrupt his autopsy, especially not his life, so he’d have to operate in secrecy against his roommate, the ever-so-indolent conscience.
He put in the hours and even overtime. this work made him finally feel alive. to feel god’s gift of sorrow and happiness. sometimes at the same time. the frustrations and the successes came and went, but he loved every second of it.
If that box never appeared, he would’ve remained adrift in the realm of blandness.